[Lisa Strata, her friend Forsithia, and Excrucio are convened around a table in an outdoor cafe
where Lisa's friend grills Excrucio on his credentials to date the dance master. When we see them first, Excrucio and Forsithia
are having an arm wrestling contest, which appears evenly matched--to a point.]
FORSITHIA
So, you mean to have a date with our dear sister, Lisa Strata.
First, your true intentions I her bosom buddy need to know:
For instance, how would it matter
If she wanted, Lisa Strata,
To see other women,
Since we have a right to know?
Next, there is the question, certainly,
Of how far you mean to go:
Is your plan some carnal conquest,
Take your belt off just to notch it?
If she resists, does that botch it?
Would you slam her like a mosh pit?
Is that your intention
Since we have the right to know?
[Forsithia emphatically drives
Excrucio's hand to the table top, rattling the dinner plates.]
EXCRUCIO
I assure you I'm a gentle fellow
Seeking nothing with the best intentions.
Those who know me know I'm mellow.
As for violence--I am yellow.
Not the sort who makes rude assumptions.
[Forsithia grabs Excrucio's hand
for another arm wrestle.]
FORSITHIA
What about those "good intentions"?
That's the problem with your sex:
Once a woman drops her guard,
She's bound to lose all sovereignty!
They're all schemers, drunken dreamers!
Coupling like a carabiner!
Anything to trick us into their dark prisons!
Lisa, sweetheart, since you asked me,
He's no different than the rest!
Looking for a hen to handle
While you're brooding on his nest!
Take my advice: send him packing!
Fly away--you'll have my backing!
Flee this skinny doofus
And his scrawny clutches!
[Forsithia dashes Excrucio's hand
against the table top triumphantly.]
EXCRUCIO
I assure you, I'm not macho
Or a tyrant out to crush a woman's freedom!
All I want is civil discourse!
I'm not after a commitment.
If that's a thing, for me it isn't.
LISA STRATA
Will you be my friend?
And true to the end?
FORSITHIA
Lisa, I'm surprised you're falling
For his lies--it's appalling!
Can't you see the vile lust burning in his gimlet eyes?
Every man's a narcissist
Who wants nothing but to tryst!
You see he's no winner.
Let him pay for dinner!
You won't budge! I'll leave without you
There's a haze that hangs about you.
I counted on much more from a public minister!
I expect your career is wrecked
When the others have their druthers.
Guard your suspect virtue.
This affair can hurt you!
[Exeunt Forsithia.]
EXCRUCIO
Entre nous it's a no-brainer!
Maybe I could recite Homer,
Satire by that Cloudcuckoo cuckoo!
I just want to share your brilliance!
I'm not after a commitment.
If that's a thing, for me it isn't.
LISA STRATA
Can you sing a poem?
Will you take me home?
